Irina Khakamada: A jealous man next to me has nothing to do

Irina Khakamada: A jealous man next to me has nothing to do
Irina Khakamada: A jealous man next to me has nothing to do
Anonim

Or he must understand that the male attention that pours on me from all sides is nothing more than secular communication. Or we'll have to disperse.

Irina Khakamada: A jealous man next to me has nothing to do

I've come across very jealous men. And each time, relations with them gradually reached round-table negotiations: either you accept me, or we scatter. Once we really ran away - hard, but honestly. We found out the relationship, realized that we were not suitable for each other, and that's it. And in other cases, men squeezed themselves into a fist: despite jealousy, they were interested in talking to me and they tried to remake themselves. But this is a temporary phenomenon. If a man is pathologically jealous, it is impossible to change the situation. If you are not afraid, you can communicate with him, but you should not start a family in any case. Of course, when a man is jealous at the level of rhetoric, it is very pleasant. But if this is followed by at least one scandal, then there is no question of any pleasure.

Jealousy is primarily self-doubt. But it is also superimposed on the genetic sense of ownership, which goes to men from the animal world. Fighting this instinct is very difficult. But there are unique men, for example, my fourth husband. He is really self-sufficient, he also wants to have his own world, in which no one interferes, that he calmly looks at all my contacts and going out with other men. He doesn't care at all. He only cares about keeping me interested. He respects me as a person and understands that I have to develop further. This is a very high level of relationships, few people come to them, but there are such couples.

I'm pretty jealous myself. But my jealousy is quite conceptual. This means that I'm not jealous of the little things. I am so selfish that it is easier for me not to suffer about where my husband is, but to read books, have fun or go to my friends myself, than to torment both him and myself with senseless interrogations. And secondly, over time and with four marriages, I weaned myself a little from jealousy.

And lastly, this is what I described in the novel “Love. Out of the game”: a man, unlike a woman, is still polygamous. He can declare his love to both his wife and his mistress with equal success. And in both cases, he will be absolutely sincere. It just means different things. And the sooner you accept this state of affairs, the calmer you will look at it.

Popular topic