The heroines of the "Women's League: Guys, Money and Love" sketchcom on TNT are four determined women who are capable of a lot. Anyone who has ever seen them on the screen will surely remember their jokes for a long time - well-aimed, perky and topical. However, they are not always joking. With "DO" Anna Ardova, Olga Medynich, Anna Antonova and Olga Tumaykina agreed to talk about the most important thing in a woman's life - about men, about children, about friends and about work.
About men: When you live alone, you can see it in the eyes
A woman in marriage is changing. In an unsuccessful marriage, with a bad man, you can make a monster out of a beauty. By a bad man, I mean an absolute egoist who lives only for himself. Most often, such men are gifted individuals who are liked by women. And they like women. Such a man, having chosen a bright woman, begins to look after her beautifully, conquers her, and then, drop by drop, etches her individuality out of her, turning her into property, gray and quiet. Most often this happens when a woman is much younger, or just very in love, or brought up like that by her mother. Our mothers were held hostage to the idea that the marriage must be saved in any case, that "oh, where am I going to go?". But I think if you start to push, you have to get out. Otherwise, you can lose yourself.
But if a man loves a woman, she becomes beautiful. Any woman blossoms during love. Of course, her work and children save her alone. Around me there are examples of very beautiful independent young ladies. But every minute I wish them to find love. Because after all, it’s not in vain that yin and yang, it’s not in vain that the two halves are. When he passes over 35, it becomes noticeable in the eyes that a person lives alone.
Love is of the utmost importance for both men and women. They live for it, sometimes they die for it. Through love, the human race continues. And, of course, a man plays a huge role in a woman's life. If this, of course, is a normal woman and a normal man. I don't mean deviations, it's just, for example, there are a lot of movements towards emancipation and metrosexuality among women: loners who take care of themselves too much. Probably, such behavior at some stage is even correct, but only for the time being. It seems to me that it is useful for a woman to be married at least once. When I got married, I was very afraid, worried, and my mother said: “Go, go, it doesn’t matter who you marry for the first time.” Although I am certainly happy for those people who, once united, live together for a lifetime, I respect and adore them.
Mutual love is a constant two-way work, which is not always pleasant, but necessary! It happens that a scythe finds a stone, but mutual love is the ability to bypass such sharp corners. Like friendship, because friendship is the same love, only without sex. To exist together, you need to be able to grind. This applies to both men and women. It is easier for men - they are more holistic, they have a goal and they go towards it. And we feel more, we have more facets, but we scatter into trifles, disintegrate, weave lace. A man is harder to break, but if he breaks, then for a long time. A man is a triangle: he is stable, but if one side is broken, the rest collapse and recover for a long time, this is a given. But we have the same essence - both men and women strive for love. First you need to learn to love yourself. A person who does not love himself is hysterical and demands love from everyone around him, without giving it in return. Therefore, you need to learn to love yourself, and then you will be able to love others.
About girlfriends: Every woman needs to be unraveled
I can boast - I have those whom I call not friends, but beloved women. And almost all of them are time-tested - I have known them for a very long time. Friendship is like love. I have girlfriends, I love them very much, and our relationship is very similar to love, only without what happens between a man and a woman. Both in friendship and in love, relations develop in approximately the same way: first we get to know each other, then we get used to each other. So it was with all my friends, very rarely I met a person and began to be zealously friends with him. Every woman needs to be recognized, unraveled.
Can't tell the difference between female friends and male friends. I have a wonderful friend, and we have a very warm, trusting relationship with him. When we start talking, he sometimes says: "I have a feeling that I am your stupid girlfriend." Do I believe in friendship between men and women? Since I have a friend, then I believe. Of course, there are some purely feminine topics, very intimate ones that you will not discuss with male friends. Although, in principle, it depends on a friend - sometimes men come across who are easier to talk to than women. I have a lot to say to my only male friend. But if we still talk about the differences, then they are as follows: a woman, of course, will understand you better. She is a woman and a man will have to somehow take your place, it is difficult.
There is a stereotype, a big delusion of men, that women, when meeting, discuss only men and rags. Although we have a huge number of interesting topics for conversation. Frankly, how many times I happened to be a witness to purely male meetings and conversations, I was so convinced that they talk about women much more often than we talk about them. Men, probably, are more closed, but if they meet, they will wash the bones in such a way that it will not seem to anyone. Of course, we are talking about men too. But, since I, for example, have a lot of close friends who are connected with creativity, we talk about work, and about what is happening around, and discuss premieres and books that we have read - that's enough! But even on such topics, you and your girlfriend and your friend talk differently. You still don’t fully trust your friend, you can’t be completely frank with her, she speaks with you a little in a different language. And a friend exists on your wave, she will understand what you are talking about, even from a minimum of spoken words. As for me, I can only talk heart to heart with a friend, I will not be frank with anyone else.
When introducing my girlfriend to someone, I say, "That's my girlfriend." Although, I can probably say this: "This is my friend." Looking around, I notice that not everyone has time-tested friends. But I am a happy person, I have a circle of my favorite people. At any moment I can call any person from this little circle of mine and know that he will break loose and come, just like me. More to say, my mother is a friend. Over the years, it turned out that we became close friends, and I really like it.
About career: Work should not interfere with the family
I recently thought about it and realized that there are three types of women in the "woman - work" tandem. The first type are women who devote themselves to home, husband and family. They don't work at all, and that suits them. They are housewives, raise children, go to school with them, take them to kindergarten, take care of them, take care of the house, their husband when he comes home from work, and in general only a man works in the family. The second type is women who have a family, children, but at the same time they have a job where they realize their personal potential. Such women understand that they are in business, and try to combine both family and work. And the third type is female careerists. They are ready to give up family and children for the sake of career growth, success, for the sake of their business, a sort of business woman. As for me, the best option is the second, in which a woman cannot give up her children and family for the sake of work. In extreme cases, of course, she can give up work for the sake of children. But at the same time she has her own place where she realizes the possibilities. At the same time, she has a family. That is, she is a complete person. I think 30% of her is work, the rest is family and children. It happens, of course, that a woman decides first to build a career, earn money, and then take care of her family.
But everything in this world is unpredictable, and it may happen that you build this system, but everything will turn out differently: you fall in love, get married, give birth to children and - do not care about your career! In this sense, I go with the flow. I'm not looking to build a career faster, and I'm also not looking to get married and have kids faster. As it turns out - so it turns out. I get both there and there, to be honest. Carefully, little by little, without haste, but - forward, without specific plans. If next year I want to get married and have children, I will do it, and no career will hurt. Everything goes on. I used to rely on fate: life is wiser, it will lead. I don't know what to give up for a career. Probably, if we talk about the profession of an actress, then many deny themselves food due to the fact that they are forced to keep a figure. This is a certain way of life, a certain diet, you definitely need to go to bed at 11, have breakfast in a certain way, and so on. But this is not a refusal, but rather an imprint that the profession leaves on life. You can still afford to give up vacation. But I would cheat - I would refuse only half of the vacation.
Self-realization is important, and those women who do what they love are lucky. Because this is an outlet, and it doesn’t matter if half the world loves you, or only your colleagues, or household members evaluate this as the right step. It is important that the woman herself feel that at work she does what she likes and what does not interfere with her personal life. But when work begins to interfere with the family, it is worth considering.
I feel a bit sorry for those women who completely give up their careers and devote themselves to the hearth. But I still understand that they have some kind of occupation at home, they are looking for an outlet for their energy. You can't stay at the stove forever. In any case, a woman needs to splash out her unsatisfied abilities. The main thing is to have harmony and response.
About children: Nothing will stop us from being happy
Children are great! I categorically affirm that children cannot interfere with a career. Maybe I say this because I don’t have sharp ambitions called “boarding the career ladder, God forbid, roll down it.” Priorities are changing rapidly, and I am glad that children are the main one among them. I will not talk about the family - I will not hide the fact that I am raising my children on my own. Francoise Sagan said: "The sun shines for two." Perhaps she meant a mother with a child, and I agree with her.
The birth of my first child inspired me with constant fear - for him, for myself, for a randomly running dog, because I don’t know her mood, but I’m sure that all her teeth are in place. The birth of my second child, apparently, slowed me down a bit. I didn’t become loose and slow, like a mammoth, just with the birth of Marusya, I got a motto: “Nothing prevents us from being happy!”. There were terrible situations in my life, because of this, the character changed, but there was always a choice - to save myself as a person or not to save. I'm sure there's always a minute to decide to keep yourself human.
With the birth of children comes another responsibility - not the one that has always been. On the series "Cream", which we shoot for TNT, I worked as a pregnant woman. And it became necessary to play the birth scene. I insisted that, being in a position, I would not play it, I would not provoke the body, imitating the birth of a child. But then, when Marusya was born, I successfully played this scene. In addition, experiments related to nudity are already in the past. As an actress, I understand why directors sometimes need such scenes - it can be beautiful, justified and interesting. But - absolutely not. I'm also wary of scenes leading up to a character's death. I know how to exist radically and even dangerously, I had experience - until recently I played in the play “Phaedra. Golden Ear "Andriy Zholdok (a talented director who likes to provoke, in a good sense of the word) and Pavel Kaplevich. I played with pleasure, despite the fact that there were moments in the literal sense of an aortic rupture. But now I'm taking a timeout. I would rather read Gogol's story "Viy" than play the character who lay in the coffin. Before the birth of children, I probably would have agreed, now I don’t.
I understood what it means to exist right now. And I say that I am a happy person. Arthur Miller said: “A huge number of people have gathered in the world ready to rush towards each other, they just don’t have enough time for this right now.” I am glad that I have ceased to be afraid of this path to meet - probably soon I will embark on this path. And, perhaps, I will find the harmony that I lack. I am a slow person flying in a hot air balloon and want to allow myself to fly as long as possible. The Japanese say that yesterday has already passed, tomorrow has not yet come, and today - here it is, live and enjoy. And I got a blue-eyed incentive for this - the hero of my life. It's like daylight, like a given. I will not say that it helps me, that I draw strength from this - I draw it from myself. But I really like it. And I will allow myself such a quivering pastime.