Does nothing make you happy? This means that you are not happy with anything you have tried.
A psychologist and TV presenter Galina Timoshenko talks about how to get joy from life in any circumstances.
Tell me honestly, do you see the fundamental difference between the slogans "The people and the party are united", "We are for a he althy lifestyle" and "We should enjoy life"? Personally, I don't. A slogan is a slogan. Available but not implemented. What is being done is usually called something else - a cry, for example. In order to raise people, say, to war, to a fire or to a pogrom, a cry is required. The slogan won't work.
By the way, why won't it work? Yes, because it is not clear from it what it is - the unity of the party and the people, why it is necessary and how to do it. The slogan has a fundamentally different task. What is it? Of course, one cannot talk about slogans about everything in the world, but this is what can be said about the slogan “We must enjoy life”. This slogan is used in one single case: when a person comes to you to complain about life, and you have no desire to figure out why he feels bad and think about how to help him. You tell him: "You just need to learn to enjoy life," and that's it. It seems like he didn’t shrug off a person, and he didn’t waste a second of his own precious time or a calorie of his energy.
And whoever utters this call (girlfriend, psychologist, colleague or someone else), it has no other practical significance. Anyway, it's not a bit clear what it means to enjoy life, what it gives and how to learn it.
But at the same time, everyone somehow implicitly understands that enjoying life is probably great. It remains to find out one thing: HOW TO DO IT.
I know of only two ways to learn to enjoy life
The first way is to turn the slogan into a cry. The basis of this translation is quite simple.
Remember how many times you said: “Yes, I understand everything with my head, I just do it differently …” Do you know why you do things completely different from what your smart head understands? Yes, because at this moment your head and your feelings understand the situation in completely different ways. This is the slogan. A cry is just when the head and heart say the same thing. Feelings, like the body, cannot lie. Therefore, if they support their heads in some way, there is no doubt that their joint plans will be successfully implemented.
So, all that is needed is to find such a formulation of the slogan "We must enjoy life", which will be supported by feelings. Moreover, feelings are usually supported only by what they understand. But such words as “need”, “duty” and the like, they do not understand. Therefore, we only need to choose words that for us would not only be filled with some significant intellectual content, but also meaningfully and definitely emotionally colored.
For example, I know one person who witnessed a car drive into a bus stop and run over three people. Since then, it is enough for this person to say to himself the phrase “And I am alive!” - and he immediately begins to desperately enjoy life, and quite sincerely. Maybe not too philanthropic - but it works! Yes, and with philanthropy there is still a big question: he doesn’t drop bricks on other people and doesn’t push them under cars in order to once again make sure that he himself is alive. Once was enough.
This, of course, does not mean at all that any other person, even who also witnessed someone's death, will also begin to rejoice by saying the same phrase to himself. The whole trick is just to find such a phrase inside yourself completely independently. And this phrase can be incredibly exotic, at first glance it has nothing to do with the theme of the joy of life. “Yes, well, all of them!”, “The sky is blue”, “Hurrah!” - anything will do, as long as it is felt at some point by every cell of the body.
Of course, this method has its pitfalls. For example, do not confuse a call with an auto-training formula. Once I had a 60-year-old woman at my appointment with such a bunch of diseases that she did not leave the house without an impressive first-aid kit. So she was decisively disappointed in auto-training after she kept repeating to herself for a month: “I am getting younger, more beautiful and he althier every day.” Of course, we all know how to lie to ourselves, but we still need to know the measure …
One more subtlety of call-technology: no need to tie your call to favorable circumstances. Let's say the phrase "Everything will be fine" does not work, and that's it! Because EVERYTHING does not happen well - the laws of physics do not allow: if it increases somewhere, then somewhere it will definitely decrease …
And one more thing: it is clear that in order to find your own joyful cry, this joy - real, to the depths of the soul - must still be experienced at least once. Otherwise, the slogan will work again.
The second way is even more obvious. It is quite enough to find out what your actions give you joy, and learn how to carry out these actions in any life circumstances. After all, it is absolutely not necessary to rejoice precisely in the fact that it is raining or the sun is shining. You and your actions are also life, and if the world around you is not too concerned with giving you pleasant moments, then you yourself can take care of this?
Of course, in this case, your chances of success (in the sense of constant joy from life) are the higher, the more of your actions, in principle, are able to bring you joy and the more ways to carry out these actions, regardless of the complexities of the life situation, you have. This is what can cause skeptics to be malicious: they say, what if nothing brings joy? And if it is impossible to perform your “joyful actions” in the existing circumstances?
The answers to these questions, however, are quite simple. First, if nothing brings joy, it means that nothing brings joy from what you ALREADY did. This means that we must try to do something new, and not try to do it, but do it and do it well. And secondly … However, “secondly” is the same as “firstly”: if it is not possible to perform some actions under the existing circumstances, this means that it does not work out by the tried and tested methods. So maybe do something completely unexpected?