Psychologist and TV presenter Galina Timoshenko talks about how to tune in to the best
Are you sure you'll love this?
You mean, if a good mood never leaves you? I know only one category of people that it never leaves. I saw a lot of them - in psychiatric hospitals with an eternal blissful smile on their faces … And in general, what is it - a good mood? After all, only Mayakovsky knew exactly what is “good” and what is “bad”. An ordinary person does not know this - and thank God, by the way. Good means nice? Let's say. Then a good person must be pleasant in all respects, and to everyone. For some reason, such a possibility seems very doubtful to me … Or, say, such an interesting feeling as gloating. Is it pleasant? And how! Does everyone agree that it is good? Not sure.
So, "good" is not necessarily "pleasant". Maybe a good mood is just a joyful mood? Also unlikely. Judge for yourself: they listened to the news about another plane crash - and were delighted. A loved one was buried - how joyful in the soul! Looks like they missed the definition again. It turns out that a good mood does not exist in nature? Or is it so rare that we don't even know what it is?
No, that doesn't work at all. The thing is different: it is simply amazing how little people think about what is the very basis of their life - about themselves, about what is happening inside them. For example, about what it is - a good mood that everyone dreams of, where it comes from, for what reasons, does it happen to everyone … And how can you strive to be in a good mood if you have no idea what it is? ! Let's figure it out.
It is quite clear that somehow the notorious "good mood" must be connected with feelings. It is not a fact that it implies the need to experience some specific feelings - but some relation to feelings is clearly implied. Here the first difficulties begin, and rather unexpected ones. They are connected with the very structure of our language. Do you guess that it is the language that determines our mentality, our way of perceiving the world and much more in our life? So in our language there are almost three times more words denoting unpleasant emotions, feelings and emotional states than words denoting pleasant feelings. Can you imagine?
As far as I know, the Hispanics are much more fortunate. In their language, the opposite is true: there are much more words about pleasant feelings than about unpleasant ones, and, accordingly, these pleasant feelings have more different shades. A recent sociological survey confirms the above. Residents of various countries were asked the question: how often do they enjoy life? The first ten places were taken - who do you think? - countries of Latin America. And in the first place is Cuba - a country with, to put it mildly, not the highest standard of living. It turns out that a good mood is not too closely related to the presence of specific objective reasons for joy, delight, rapture, admiration and other feelings that are pleasant to experience.
Then, maybe it's worth thinking about the structure of the word "mood" itself, since nothing is clear about the word "good"? Apparently, it is formed from the verb "tune", that is, to give harmony, balance, consistency. True, it is not very clear how the mood differs from the mood. Words arranged in this way usually describe a certain process, action - which is why they are called verbal nouns. That is, the mood is the end result, and the mood is a constant action to create and maintain this mood. There is only one question - what are we tuning in for?
Let's try to draw a parallel with piano tuning. Why is it set up? To be able to bring the sound of the instrument in line with what the composers write. Or, in other words, so that the musical instrument is able to perform its main task.
Then it turns out that our mood is a constant action, the purpose of which is to bring us, loved ones and the only ones, into a state of readiness to fulfill our main task at the moment. And in order to understand the urgent task, you need to know at every moment of life what I really want now. At the same time, feelings are vital - so as not to confuse "must" and "should" with real "I want." After all, debts arise when there is no real desire. Really, who would think to say “you need to swim” when he wants it with all his might?!
The thing is that when we really want something, it is always a state full of emotions, and the most pleasant ones at that. We imagine that our desire has already come true - and we are happy, we experience delight, bliss, excitement, pride, gratitude … Isn't it difficult?