Holidays are over, and the child is sitting in front of the TV and does not want to hear about reading and math?
When kids get bored, they get involved in stories they should stay away from
Long summer vacation is a trap many parents fall into. Surely, by the beginning of summer, you have already formed many plans: together with your children, you will re-read a lot of interesting books and discuss them excitedly, you will ride bicycles, have picnics, go fishing in the mornings and just talk about everything in the world - in a word, you will do everything for which there is not enough time during the school year. And, of course, you will improve math and English. But, as soon as free days begin, you, without noticing it, gradually adjust your plans. What's wrong with a child watching a movie tonight and sleeping a little longer tomorrow morning? Let him take a week off from lessons and classes, and after that you will properly take up the summer program. And here, before you have time to look back, July comes and it turns out that the children are completely out of hand. They watch TV or play computer games all day long, gorge themselves on sweets and chips, stay up late and sleep until dinner. Morning fishing and picnics are out of the question, and when you remember books and English, screaming and slamming doors begin. Half of the summer has been wasted, is there really nothing to fix?
Children demand "some free time" and "rest", but in reality they are unlikely to enjoy complete idleness. Sooner or later, the child will become bored, namely, from boredom and the inability to occupy themselves with something interesting, children often get involved in stories from which it is better to stay away. But, on the other hand, schoolchildren really need rest, and parents who try to maintain a strict day regimen even in summer do not achieve anything but conflicts. Nevertheless, there are methods that will help you negotiate with your child and combine relaxation and useful activities.
Discuss your options with your child
Most of the time, our good intentions remain just plans, because parents and children have completely different goals. For example, you plan to re-read all of Charles Dickens with your child at your leisure, but the student himself only dreams of going through all 125 levels of his favorite computer game. Many arguments can be avoided by first sitting down and discussing vacation plans together. Of course, it is best to do this at the end of the school year, but it is not too late to start this conversation during the holidays. Ask each other questions about last summer: “What do you remember most? What was the most enjoyable day? And which is the most unpleasant? And do not be surprised if it turns out that the children most of all remember not the books that you forced them to read, and not the excursions, but the day when you gave up on the daily routine and rode bicycles around the neighborhood until late, and dad told the children on the way about how he studied at school.
The daily routine can be organized according to the principle of a pyramid, in much the same way as nutritionists paint proteins, fats and carbohydrates. At the base of your vacation pyramid there should be basic useful activities: hobbies, reading, circles, creativity, activities. The next level is outdoor games, walks, sports, helping parents. Together, the lessons from the first and second levels should take about six hours a day. And at the very top of the pyramid is "dessert" - a computer, TV, talking on the phone and the opportunity to just laze around from the heart. Moreover, you do not need to adhere to this scheme rigidly, by all means. Surely there will be days when there will be much more "desserts" than everything else, it's not scary. The main thing is that during the week you manage to maintain a balance of activities from all three groups.
Share the responsibilities
When a child has certain responsibilities around the house, he begins to feel his real contribution to the family. And besides, it is a great way to develop responsibility in children. During the holidays, schoolchildren have much more free time, which means that there is every opportunity to introduce children to household chores.
Few guys volunteer to help their parents at home or in the country, and often we decide that it's easier to do everything ourselves than endlessly reminding us to sweep the floor. To make it easier to negotiate, offer the child several options to choose from. And best of all, if you manage to present some business as a kind of privilege - something that only adults are allowed to do. A 12-year-old boy might enjoy cutting his own lawn with a lawnmower, while a girl would enjoy making a salad or decorating a cake.
Another important point: let the children themselves choose the time when they will perform their duties. If at the dacha the car that takes out the garbage arrives on Saturday at two o’clock in the afternoon, then you can say this: “A car will come at two to pick up the garbage, please find a moment to put all the bags over the fence by this time.”
Of course, in family matters there is always a place for pleasant rewards and a little blackmail. If the daughter asks: “Can I go to my friend?” - it is quite possible to answer: “Of course! As soon as you clean up your room.”
One more piece of advice: do not entrust your child with long and tedious tasks. If you need to move a pile of sand that was poured out at the gate into the depths of the site, children are unlikely to like it. Such an activity seems truly endless, and the child simply does not have the patience. It is best to start with those things that you can finish quickly enough and see the result of your work.
When it's done, don't forget to praise the kids. Even if your daughter didn’t clean the floor in the kitchen perfectly, say: “It’s nice when everything is clean! Thank you!”
Be sure to study during the holidays
Let's start with the bad news: kids who don't make time for school during the summer break learn worse and lag behind their peers. By middle school, the difference between those who spent the summer usefully and those who only watched TV becomes palpable, and by the ninth or tenth grade it often turns into an abyss. How to be parents so that the child reads during the summer holidays?
- Let your child choose books. You might choose Tom Sawyer for summer reading, but if your child prefers vampire stories, don't resist. Over time, the student will move on to more difficult things, but this will happen only when he is ready for it. The fact is that children need an exciting story, they are attracted only by this. And if the language of the book is too difficult or the story itself doesn't seem interesting, children will simply refuse to read.
- Let me read the same books again. Last year, my daughter read all of Harry Potter, and now she has taken it up again? Don't mind! Going back to a favorite book is like spending time with an old friend. After reading the book for the second time, the child will surely find something new in it.
- Start a summer club. Working out with a friend is always more fun than doing it alone. Try to arrange with the parents of friends and once a week to meet at someone's house and discuss books. This will help children better understand the content and remember what they read.
- Use technology. Child doesn't want to read? How would he feel about reading e-books on a pocket computer?
Have fun with your family
Children most enjoy the moments when the whole family deviates from the usual schedule and does something interesting. For example, in the evening in the country, you can go outside with a laptop and popcorn and watch a new movie with friends. Children will remember this evening for a long time! There are some other good options as well.
- Dine outside. Having lunch or dinner together is one of the most important things to feel like a family. American scientists even came to the conclusion that children who regularly eat with their parents are less likely to be overweight and sleep better. A great option for summer is a picnic in nature.
- Take a look at the nearest museum. If you spend part of your holidays in the country, explore the surroundings. What if there is an abandoned monastery nearby? Or an iron museum? Such a trip will not take long, but it can be very educational if you first read about the place where you are going.
- Push your way if necessary. If your child responds to all your suggestions with a stubborn “I don’t want to”, sometimes he still needs to be forced to participate in a cultural program. You can agree like this: “Today we spend time as you like, but tomorrow I choose!”
- Deviate from the daily routine within reasonable limits. Most children believe that the ability to go to bed late and wake up late during the holidays is their legal right. Of course, children need to get enough sleep, but doctors do not advise letting the child get up after 10 am. To solve the problem, plan for the morning something that the child enjoys, such as horseback riding lessons in the nearest village. And remember: in order to avoid additional problems in the room where the child sleeps, there should not be a TV and a computer.
Almost every mother at least once in her life screamed in a terrible voice: “If you don’t turn off the TV right now, I’ll throw it out the window!” We've never heard of moms carrying out this threat. And the children themselves understand that nothing like this will happen.
To avoid conflicts, it is best to immediately stipulate the time that the child can spend at the TV and computer. For example, you allow 2 hours of watching TV. But, if today the child used only an hour and a half, tomorrow he will be able to get an additional 30 minutes. Thanks to this pact, children feel they can decide for themselves when and what to watch.
This technique also works well: doing household chores or reading books from the summer list, a child can earn extra time for TV and computer games. Do not forget that technical entertainment should alternate with outdoor games.
And I really want to believe that when you once again drive your child out to play football or put Rafael Sabatini in his hands, he will finally understand that during the holidays there can be joys that he and didn't suspect.