You are just unhappy married: is this a reason for divorce?

Family 2022
You are just unhappy married: is this a reason for divorce?
You are just unhappy married: is this a reason for divorce?

If a husband drinks, beats - it's terrible. And you know what to do: run! But what to do if there is nothing to complain about, but you feel deeply unhappy, and the presence of your husband in your life is a burden to you? In the same way - our heroine is sure.

Divorce for no reason: what to do if you are just unhappy in marriage?

“Usually I dressed as boy-boy, I loved the military style, but on that day I looked like a bride should: I did makeup, hair, put on a wedding dress and even my mother’s necklace, in which she married her father. The eyes of all the guests were riveted on me, and I felt embarrassed: I do not like close attention. Oleg was so nervous that he didn't even tell me how great I looked. I stood in the middle of the wedding hall while the receptionist spoke memorized lines and thought, "God, what am I doing?"

Fake ring

“I remember to the smallest detail how Oleg proposed to me. It was on the day of the five-year anniversary of our acquaintance. He conceived a prank: we were sitting in a cafe, Oleg asked me to become his wife and presented me with a cheap plastic ring from a newsstand (I was upset, but tried not to show it), and then, already at home, he took out of his pocket a box with real gold.

Later, I often thought about whether that fake ring was not a bad omen of our unfinished family happiness. Oleg did not cheat on me, did not insult me, did not drink, did not make scandals. I just didn't feel happy with him.

Somehow everything went wrong, one to one: I had a boring job, a small salary, not enough friends - and marriage also did not bring joy. I didn't want to have sex with my husband. I didn't want anything at all. But I didn't even complain to my closest friends. I thought that it was my own fault, since I could not do anything to make both of us happy. Divorces were not accepted in my family: my parents and grandparents tolerated each other to the last, even when they could no longer see each other.”

17 secrets of a happy marriage.

Give myself freedom

“One day before the New Year, I gave my husband a selfish gift: he mentioned that he misses his brother, whom he had not seen for a long time, because he lives on the other side of the country. And I ordered tickets for him so that he could go visit. Those holidays were the best days of my life in recent years. I experienced great relief. I could breathe. I went dancing with my friends. I had fun until morning. I felt alive. And when I realized that my life could always be like this, I decided to get a divorce. But Oleg returned so bored that I did not immediately decide to announce my decision to him. Finally, I mustered up the courage and when he came home from work one day, I blurted out, “I can’t do this anymore. I’m leaving you.”

He was in shock and did not understand what had happened. And I didn't care anymore. Oleg called a friend and went out for a drink with him, and I found that he had left his wedding ring on the mirror. I realized that everything was really over, I collected documents and a minimum of things and left for my parents. Of course, I was incredibly sad. Oleg is a very good person and I feel like I broke his heart and caused him incredible pain. He was just crushed. He called me at night and sobbed into the phone. Six years have passed, but I still feel a huge guilt that will always remain with me like a scar.

When I went to the registry office for a divorce certificate, I saw through the glass window of the foyer that he was already there, and hid behind a column so that he would not notice me. He was thin and looked terrible. I felt the light dim in my eyes, everything around seemed blurry because of the tears. It is hard when you are abandoned, but it is not at all easier to inflict pain yourself. I still cry when I remember that day. We tried to remain friends, met a couple of times to have a meal together, but it was very awkward and incredibly sad. I don't think he's met anyone yet.”

Fate enters without knocking

“After the divorce, I thought that marriage was not for me at all. But then I met Zhenya and, as they say, I immediately realized that this was fate. We got married last year without any grand ceremony - there were only my mother and sister. We arrived at the registry office by metro, I was wearing a pretty, but rather simple dress, bought almost on the run. Our love with Zhenya changed me a lot. I became softer and more sociable. And today I am happy. Love is not an easy and unfair thing, and no one can guarantee that it will take and not pass. But it's worth the try." Based on materials from, photo: Getty Images.

10 things to know about divorce.

Popular topic