We have long wanted to know how men see the ideal woman, so we made a mini-survey to write this article. And you know what? They contradict themselves. Because it's impossible to put it all together!
She should be smart, but let her be crazy!
We would understand this wish, if the phrase "to take out the brain" meant scandals and unreasonable demands. But no! A woman who blows her mind is a woman who asks uncomfortable questions. A woman who wants to discuss relationships. A woman who doubts analyzes the situation and demands the same from her partner. I mean, she's a smart woman. How, one wonders, can you be smart, but at the same time not use your mind in everyday life?
She should be on her own, but what an adorable fool
We translate from masculine to human: a woman must solve all her problems on her own, let her family's problems be solved somehow without male participation. But when you need to reinstall the system on your home computer or tame the enraged washing machine - there is nothing even to try to fix everything yourself. You need to make the lips a bow and bleat: “Darling, I didn’t touch anything, it’s on its own!” Well, to make him feel like a Real Man.
She should make good money, but at the same time she should be an excellent housekeeper
"Go to school, go to school, and then bam! - second shift". Combining career and housekeeping is impossible. Or the young lady will have a non-dusty part-time job (for which, of course, they pay a penny) and borscht-pickles-pies, or she will have a career and a housekeeper. Of course, you can combine career and home - at the cost of incredible efforts and quick burnout. But! The next paragraph excludes this.
She should be incredibly pretty but shouldn't spend a lot of money on beauty
Write it down, girls: firm buttocks, the thinnest waist, plump lips, lush mop of hair, not a hint of cellulite, erect breasts and a face without wrinkles. All this must be preserved until the menopause itself, and if this was not originally there, it must be created. But not to the detriment of the family budget, work and household chores! What are 6 hours a week in the gym? Why beautician? Breast augmentation surgery? You're crazy, woman! Do you even know how much it costs?!
She shouldn't restrict his freedom, but she should be jealous. In moderation
About freedom, we completely agree, of course. But we do not really understand how this is combined with jealousy. And men understand. If a woman is not jealous, they do not feel needed and assume that she does not care at all. So you need to be jealous, but at the same time let you go to another city for a football match and not call every hour, because it infuriates. I mean, just be jealous. He will come - and tell him: “Oh, I was so jealous, I was completely exhausted! But you, of course, go again.” Something like that, probably, yes?
She should be "her boyfriend" while remaining "quivering doe"
In the sense that when he wants to drink beer and watch The Big Lebowski for the hundredth time, you need to keep him company: sip straight from the bottle, drop popcorn on yourself and neigh like a mail horse. And when his friends come to visit, to do the same, you need to delicately hide behind the kitchen door, muttering: “Oh, no, I don’t like this. Have fun, boys!”
She should be chaste but love blowjob and anal sex
And in general, let him make love provocatively, with a twinkle. But blowjob and anal sex are the main points, of course: it is desirable that she herself offers and, of course, receives her orgasms from this. Instant. But most importantly, let her experience be modest and exceptionally chaste: first love, missionary position, that's all. This is great, of course, but there is a question: how can you become a sexual goddess without experience, huh? Show us a sexual theorist, we want to see it.
She shouldn't have bad habits, but let her drink like a lady
So that you don't get drunk or look drunk. How, how can you learn to drink if you don't drink? Answer: no way. A non-drinking girl, after the very first glass, goes to the blue distances - to look for unicorns pooping like a rainbow. But you can't drink at all, right? No. A non-drinking girl is terribly boring and suspicious. So let him not drink at home, never at all, but at a party let him gracefully dip his lips into a glass and talk about the 2007 Bordeaux harvest, which - what a pity! - completely failed.
Let everyone lust for her, and she - no one but her husband
So you have to become an extraordinarily sexy woman with the worldview of a nun. To attract males, but to see in them exclusively innocent lambs. For this woman, men should crawl on their knees, and along the way, let them desperately envy her lucky husband. And let her be impregnable, like Troy, and cold, like an iceberg in the ocean. And only at home let it turn into a sexy kitty and tear off. But how?!
